A question for all 3 of my readers!

I've had this blog for nearly six years now. It's always been called, "Interesting, but not too Interesting." The title came from a conversation I had with friends after dating yet another weirdo. My cousin, Brandon, pointed out that I always seemed to date very "interesting" guys. After discussing this with my girlfriends, I said, "I do like them interesting, but not too interesting." It was hilarious at the time. Seriously. ...maybe you had to be there. It totally worked since this blog was born of a break-up.

Anyhow, my question is, do I change the name of my blog? It's been a while and the title still cracks me up, but does anyone really get it? My life has changed and more changes are on the way. Time to move on, or keep it the same?

Discuss.

Halloween 2010

I'm so proud of myself for posting these before next year! My family LOVES Halloween and although Grit has hated it his whole life, he's warming up to it. The family gathered at my sister's house to party. I couldn't decide on a costume and was planning on going without but decided last minute to use the extra wedding dress (that's a whole other story!) and to make my makeup dark and creepy. It worked great. Grit was going to be a viking but decided he wanted to throw on the vest he wore for our wedding and try to match me. It was too hot for the whole suit. My nephews kept telling him he looked like a hippie. My 2 year old niece was a little bit scared of us at first, but she got used to us!

Better Late than Never!

Halloween 2009. Hee hee.
Featuring: Me as Medusa, Grit as Zeus, Peaches as some kind of Sparkly Princess and as Herself with Wig, Boodj as a Mummy, Cheeks as a Police Officer/Spider Man, Ritz as Hermione, Mika the dog as Herself, Shiny as Himself and as Himself with Wig, Spanky aka Dewey also as Himself and Himself with Wig.

Forgive me for the awful photo formatting - blogger changed it and I haven't got it wrangled yet!

Censorship

I've been reading birth books like crazy lately trying to get my Dona certification done and have read so very many amazing ones. If you need a recommendation, let me know. If you want to know what to avoid, let me know. While I was getting ready for work today, my darling husband started flipping through one of the books I recently picked up at the library and found that some kind (read: crazy) soul had carefully cut out mini post-it strips to cover some of the breasts and labias in the book. The offending spots seemed to be chosen at random since there were plenty of graphic photos of childbirth that were left untouched. We flipped through the whole book cracking up and removing the censor-its. Maybe you find line drawings and photographs of childbirth offensive, but I certainly hope not.

Hello Friends!

I am really excited for Halloween! I'm throwing a Halloween party for my family and friends this year. No one gets through the door without a costume. I don't recall EVER seeing my mom in a costume. I mean EVER. I'm throwing the party at her house and she HAS to dress up. First she said she was going to be a queen. Now she's going as a witch. But not like your typical black dress black hat striped tights witch. A quirky Terry Pratchett-ish witch. It's gonna be awesome. She asked me to scout out a wig for her while I was shopping yesterday and Garrett and I stumbled upon a layered 1980's rocker wig in full crimp and I couldn't resist. She loves it! I'm going as Medusa and am having a devil of a time finding small rubber snakes to go in my hair! But I'm sure I'll find some before too long. Garrett is going as Zeus. I told him it takes a real man to let his girlfriend put gold glitter all over his face. I can hardly wait. I'll be sure to post photos!

What are you doing for Halloween this year?

I COULD HAVE DIED!

This story must be told. Because it's hilarious to me. It makes me laugh on a daily basis. It's also really gross so if you are squeamish you may want to move along.

On Saturday, I spent an hour and a half sweeping all of the floors in the house thoroughly in preparation for mopping (only the bedrooms have carpet). I decided to take a little break and catch up on blogs via my Google Reader so I sat down in front of the computer in the kitchen. Whilst doing so, my brother's dog, Luna, came and sat on my foot because my mother had begun vacuuming her area rugs and poor little Luna hates the vacuum. She was shaking and cowering so I reached down and reassured her while I continued to read. My mother finished vacuuming and came over and asked about a gardening project we're working on, petted the dog, and went to the garage. 

ONE MINUTE later I stood up to follow her and had taken one step with my right foot when I felt my foot begin to slip on something wet. I lost control of my right foot as it slid forward quickly and I went down on my left (bum) knee and continued to slip until I found myself doing a twisted and painful split. It only took a second, but as soon as I began to go down I thought, "I just swept this and it wasn't wet. Where's the dog? Mom is right, this tile really is deadly when wet. I really really hope I didn't just tweak my bum knee." I rolled onto my back and lay there for a moment feeling pain in my bum knee (really, it's bad, I've dislocated it twice and it has a touch of arthritis), and wondering what caused my fall. I sat up and looked at my legs and to my horror, I'd just slipped on the biggest pile of dog vomit I've ever seen. And my lower legs were COVERED in it. If I had to estimate how much vomit was on the ground I'd say one gallon at least.  Now, Luna is not a big dog. She's a little mutt about the size of a Jack Russell terrier. How she managed to yak up a gallon of puke is beyond me. I surveyed the puke and thought, "I didn't even hear her throw up and she practically puked right on me. Doesn't she eat dog food? I see chicken, some grass, and how in the world did she get that olive?" Still a little worried about my bad knee, I stay put and began hollering at the top of my lungs for my mom. No response. I kept calling and calling. No response. Because I was yelling, Luna started to get nervous and probably thought she was in trouble. I called her over to me and soothed the little stinker. My mom finally came in from the garage and I called her into the kitchen and when she saw the carnage in front her, she scrunched up her face and told me to take my pants off and go take a shower. I tested my knee and it felt alright, so I dropped my pants right there in the kitchen with all the windows open and put my pants in the washer on my way to the bathroom. I scrubbed every inch of myself and when I came out of the shower I found that the floor was clean and my mom was sitting on the patio taking deep breaths. She said she was trying to calm the heaving. She was seriously about to yak too. Luckily she didn't because I probably would've managed to slip in that too. 

There you have it. Death by dog vomit. Almost.

On a side note, I'm really glad that I've been working out religiously every day for the past three weeks because I'm significantly stronger than I was and I think I could have really hurt myself if I hadn't improved both my strength and flexibility recently. I did pull my hamstring and groin, but it was pretty mild and two days of resting seemed to do the trick.

I do think it's endlessly funny to tell people I pulled a muscle slipping on dog vomit. Just thinking about it cracks me up all over again.

Crazytastic.

Some of you know how much I love THIS website. It's hilarious and fantastic and I've loved it for years. I love it even more now, for introducing me to the full blown crazy that is Bai Ling's blog. Sometimes billed as Ling Bai - I don't know which is correct - I only know that her specific brand of crazy is making my whole week. Seriously, her blog is just so crazytastic I can hardly contain myself. I read it out loud because it's better that way.

No words...

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Nailed 'Em - Radical Knitting

Colbert at Christmas
Colbert Christmas DVD

Green Screen
Bill O'Reilly Interview

and...

Wool Brain

Brilliant.

Warning: Don't watch this if you don't like irreverent humor... or if you like Sarah Palin.

Rambling...

One of my 43 first cousins got married last weekend, one was married the weekend before, and another one is getting married in November. So far. Wait, did anyone else get married this year? I think another one got married in the spring... oh well. Too many to remember. For reals.
The cousin that was married most recently married a wonderful woman who I like very much. The cousin who was married the week before I am assuming married a wonderful man, but I've never met him. The cousin getting married in November I haven't seen in several years so I hope his betrothed is wonderful, she's pretty, but we all know that's not enough!

Anywho... this post was about to get really really boring as I droned on about my massive family. My family can be crazay... but sometimes I wish they were a little bit crazier and a different brand of crazy. I wish they were "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" crazy, but they're waaaayyy too white-bread suburban and waayyy too Mormon for that. Ok, maybe I am going to drone on. And then I might post some fly self-portraits. 'Cuz that's how I roll.

My brain is rambling right now, so I'm trying to keep this post on track, but it's really hard.......

Really...... hard..... I might have to blog later when my thoughts aren't running all over Hell and half of Georgia.

Ok, so I went to the wedding reception on Friday night and I looked fly. But I didn't take any photos of my outfit, I didn't even remember that I had my camera on me until I was driving home around midnight and I thought it would be a good idea to take some self-portraits on the freeway.

Do I recommend it?

You decide.

psycho babble

Can anyone make sense of this? My sister and I found this crazy man's profile while perusing an LDS dating site for fun awhile back and were amazed at the nonsense that this man spewed out when asked what he is looking for. What on earth? No wonder he's still looking. Doesn't he know nobody's perfect? I'm sure he's not. I just had to post it here. Judge me if you want, but I just can't help it - outing ridiculousness is a guilty pleasure of mine.

This will be direct*. I seek someone who is well educated, refined, unpretentious, unassuming, active/strong physically and mentally, a strong personality, her own person. My personality traits include patience, tolerance, gentleness, and am very slow to anger. I seek the same. I am in good shape, well built and slender, and seek the same in my companion; "fit" matters. A balanced healthy lifestyle is important to me. If you drink soft drinks incessantly, or pursue other unhealthy habits daily, this will be a strong sticking point for an intimate relationship. We all seek charisma and beauty. But they must have enough savvy and discretion to prevent beauty from becoming a liability, and that seems rare. Romance/sensuality have a strong place in my life. Hedonistic abandonment does not. I have zero tolerance for drugs or substance abuse of any kind, present or past. I won't put that risk in my life or the life of my children. Dishonesty and lies will destroy trust and preempt any relationship. Please don't ruin this foundation by misrepresenting yourself here. I am unencumbered from bad lifestyle choices and past relationships; please travel light. Once was that women brought dowries... today, crushing debt. I prefer a woman vestured in fiscal discipline rather than a fancy wardrobe (dowry not required). I have a solid understanding of the LDS faith, in spirit and in truth, and have lived it all my life. I find a sincere and thorough church study with a prayerful search, brings a peculiar discordant dissonance with the answers. I expect my companion will also know this schism and has found how to relieve the tension this dichotomy produces in church membership. High standards and etiquette are impressive; pomposity...odious. Please know the difference. Bad experiences beg a word..., please consider. Vulgarity, coarse language, light-mindedness, rudeness, flatulent jokes, and gross childish actions should have sloughed off your personality in Jr. High. If it cleaves to you still, then I cannot. I don't preempt friendships based any point above (except honesty) so please feel free to approach me regardless if we match. I am not for everyone, but perhaps ucyibd14u.

* The above appears to elicit strong reactions both positive and negative. If so, lets chat. If you want to just "hit and run" please invest yourself elsewhere. Best wishes.

Warning: I have seen this man at institute. He walks around giving people the creepy eye while shoving food in his face. Beware.

Glee.

Conversation

Bank Clerk: I love your earrings!
Me: Thank you!
BC: You got them at Mervyn's?
Me: No, I got them from a local artist.
BC: (Gives me a quizzical look.) A what? Not at Mervyn's?
Me: (Returning the quizzical look.) No. A local artist made them and I bought them from her.
BC: Oh. That's odd. They're pretty though.
Me: Thanks?

I'm really really hot...

I'm seriously cracking up at the photo I posted. My sis, Mojo, took it around Christmas time. I know, it's sad that I crack myself up so much. Who else is going to? I'm sitting at home blowing my nose and drinking orange juice with my foot up. I called in today because I had a fever and felt so terribly unwell this morning. I'm doing better now, thanks for asking. But I've been thinking about that photo and how it really does look just like the picture of me in the hospital the day I was born. It's uncanny. So I'm going to find that picture this weekend and scan it and post it here because then you'll see that I don't look a day over... a day. Don't hate me because I'm ageless... or infantile.... whatever.

Speaking of pictures, one of my roommates took some hot photo-tos of me a few weeks back at our friend's wedding. I'm gonna try to get my hands on those and post them here as well. Not that my most recently posted photo wasn't hot...

For Old Time's Sake...

I was wandering around in my favorite knitting store last week and this song was randomly playing... I had a flashback and felt this was necessary.

How?

These are recent keywords that people used that lead them to this site:

hair really really short
jlo track suits
stupid quizzes
vagina

Not Quite Blank

I'm sconezing right now. Jonesing for a scone. I haven't even eaten a scone in like 10 years. And I don't think I even like scones. Has it really been that long? I'm gonna think about this...

...I seem to recall a scone-selling place in Provo... it was really greasy in there and I didn't want to touch anything or eat anything (and I didn't) and I was with strangers (maybe I dreamed it?)... no it was real. I seem to recall the presence of a certain Davido Hyer (coolest kid EVER)... but why were we at a greasy scone place with strangers? Maybe it was a dream. I think we went there after going to a movie... to see Spiderman 2? No, that was with the ward and James Barker met me there and it was so packed we didn't even get to sit together (I sat by Kat) and I made 3 rows of people laugh near the end of the movie. That was a good night. I Robot? No that was a bunch of wardies and Mindy Thibodeau and her man Christian - who got embarrassed when I holla-ed at Will Smith's fine behind on the screen. Napoleon Dynamite? No - Chris Bailey: the best movie buddy ever. Bourne Supremacy.... was Chris Bailey, Joe Miller and Ryan Soldan. Saints and Soldiers? Possibly... my memory is fuzzy. I know Davido was in my car on the way to a movie at some point because he fixed my window and I gave him three cheers. Was anyone else there with us that can fill in the alleged scone-incident blanks for me? This is gonna drive me mad. But now I'm thinking about all the movies I saw while living up there and all the various people I saw them with. Good Times. I really will come visit before too long.

Self Love

It's okay if you're in love with me.

I am.

This pic was taken today. My hair is up as it reached 116 degrees today!

Here's what I wrote recently:

June 9, 2007

There are days I love and respect body and days I hate it. Today I love it. I feel strong, sexy, and confident today. Days like this I want to walk around naked all day – but alas, I don’t live alone. As cool as my roommates are I still don’t think they’d appreciate it.

Everywhere we look, we're faced with some form of plastic surgery. Whether it's the obviously fake noses and breasts on tv and in magazines, or the programs showing it, selling it, and glorifying it. I sat behind a girl in church with an obvious nose job. I truly hope that it came about out of some medical necessity and not because she really hated a part of herself so much.

While watching the tragedy of self hate going on all over the TV recently, I asked myself whether or not there were any parts of my body or face that I would surgically alter. I did an inventory. I can honestly say that I wouldn't change a thing. There isn't any way that any feature could be improved upon. I believe everything to be well-suited to me.

I've had some great conversations with little girls in the shelter lately. They asked me whether I was in a relationship or not and it led to a conversation where-in I was able to talk to them about the importance of setting their own goals and making themselves happy because they will never be happy with anyone else if they can't be happy alone. Let me say that again, because it's important: If you aren't happy with yourself, by yourself, you cannot be truly happy with someone else. Your unhappiness with yourself will not go away just because someone cares about you. If you are miserable when you are single, you will carry that misery in some form into your relationships. To quote J-Lo, "Get Right." I found a really great new website recently and this lady makes some good points and asks legit questions about this very problem.

I also noticed that people frequently disassociate from their bodies. I caught myself doing it while hiking one morning. When I was having difficulty at very steep places I found myself saying things like, "My body doesn't want to do this." My body and my Self are not separate. And I did want to do it! The fact of the matter was that I was trying not to accept responsibility for being less strong than I wanted to be. Instead of disassociating from and blaming my body as if were something I cannot control, I merely needed to hike more to gain strength. Self love is a process and just when I'm sure I've gotten it down, I discover another way that I've been oppressing my Self.

I find that I feel the most beautiful, strong, and confident when I am speaking in front of other women. Encouraging them and supporting them. Empowering other women and helping them understand who they really are and what their true potential is has become my passion.

This post seems kind of disjointed to me, but I'm leaving it here because I really want to post it. I'll come back and do some more edits later.

This is a picture of my kissy-spot.

One more week...

...to the big Two Seven (27).

Fight fire with fire

I have a neighbor across the parking lot who watches every move I make. It's annoying. I know he's harmless, he just seems like a bored old man, but I find it terribly rude. I hate being leered at all the time. He seems to pay special attention to when I go to church and will be out there like clock-work when I walk out my door all dressed up. So I decided to put an end to these shananigans. For the last few weeks I've turned the tables on him by looking directly at him standing there on his balcony minding everyone's business but his own. I make it a point to immediately look up when I walk out as opposed to pretending not to see him as I've done in the past. If I'm in the parking lot or on my porch for any amount of time, I watch him. Well, for the last week, he goes inside as soon as I come out. If I look up, he looks somewhere else. No leering. Because he apparently doesn't like it. That's what I thought, sucker!