04 March 2005

Nothing, AZ

I'm sitting in an actual house, a house people! Not a dirty apartment with nasty carpet that I can't touch! I'm sitting in my bright and happy house with my nephew running around singing "ee-i-ee-i-o!" listening to Gwen Stefani sing "Rock Steady" and reading my friends' blogs and I miss you all so much it hurts. I absolutely know that I'm supposed to be here. I love when life just feels right. I'm starting an amazing job on Monday and my family couldn't be any radder. I still miss you all. Very much. So, about my trip down here... the first day I drove quickly and without incident. I set my cruise control at 90 mph and with the mix CD provided by Kat as company, it was smooth sailing to Las Vegas. I stayed with my dear friend Katie in Vegas and she took me to see the strip. The next day, after getting stuck in horrible traffic and missing my on-ramp, I made it out of Vegas after an hour. It took another hour to cross the Hoover Dam and then I was in the clear. I sped along happy as a clam making excellent time until I hit a very long and gradual hill in the middle of nowhere. My car wouldn't accelerate anymore and everytime I tried to accelerate, it would decelerate. Very angry and worried and using a few choice words. I pulled over and put my hazards on and walked around and lifted the hood. I stood on the side of the road looking under the hood not having any clue what I was looking at and cussing like a sailor. I tried to wave down some of the passing motorists, but there wasn't a good samaritan among them. I tried to call my sister-the mechanic, but I was nowhere and didn't have phone service. I decided I had to have a miracle and that it was time to cash in. I was like, "Ok, I know I've just used every expletive I could think of and that I've been angry and irrational, but I really need some help." I laughed at myself, I promise. It was funny. Cussing and praying all within a 20 minute time span. I got back in my car and started it up and put my hazards on and drove very slowly towards the top of the hill. I saw a sign for an emergency phone that was only 1/4 of a mile up the hill. I took a deep breath and focused on getting to that phone. Believe it or not, at the top of that hill there was an emergency phone, attached to a small general store with a huge sign that said "Welcome to Nothing, Arizona." And attached to the general store was a garage. A garage! I almost cried. Ok, I did cry. I walked into the store and asked a very old man for help. This man was as old as a tree. I'm not kidding. He was adorable and very wrinkled. He asked me what the trouble was and had me open the hood. He poked around and then said he'd be right back with someone who could help. He walked towards the garage and then past it into a field where he let out a sound that was a cross between an indian war whoop and a pig call. A man appeared out of the field. This man was as skinny as a pole with a beard that went down to his waist. They poked around under my hood, alleviated my fears that I had busted my car, and assured me that it was nothing serious and that I could drive the last 2 hours of my trip, slowly, but safely. It took 3 hours, but I made it home. God bless Nothing, AZ and it's very unique residents.

12 comments:

Ann-Marie said...

I am so glad that you got home safely! It seems that Nothing Arizona is where it is at!
I miss you and am trying to figure out how to start a blog!

Nama said...

leah!! i miss you like crazy!! i'm glad you made it home okay, though! call me!!!!

Nama said...

leah!! i miss you like crazy!! i'm glad you made it home okay, though! call me!!!!

Nama said...

leah!! i miss you like crazy!! i'm glad you made it home okay, though! call me!!!!

Nama said...

leah!! i miss you like crazy!! i'm glad you made it home okay, though! call me!!!!

Kirsten said...

yeah a blog. I am sooooo happy for you!!! you are home. tha tis sooo great. have you hung out with brandon yet?? I am so excited for you to start your new job, what is it?
-eddie

Em said...

Leah's new job is working as a receptionist for the hollerin' tree man. And the skinny long-bearded man seems to be a promising prospect. The commute is definitely worth it.

Leah, I miss you and your sticky sweatsuit!

Jon said...

Getcho J-Lo-liscious self back up here.

Nama said...

p.s. leah, i guess i love you so much that my comment decided to post 4 times...i love you THAT much!

Erika said...

Did the guy have butt nasty teeth? I once had to get gas about 30 miles outside of Barstow, CA and at the only gas station was a man with Billy Bob teeth. You know the fake nasty teeth they have? Well, his were real. And my brother left me alone with him so he could go pee. Sick.

Kirsten said...

FOR THE RECORD-- Lisa read your blog yesterday at my house and was lauging quite a bit. BUt it looks like she didn't comment so I just wanted to tell you.

kat said...

if i ever own a country, i'm going to name it "nowhere".
or maybe "katonia"
or "katazikstan"
and you have to cross the "katlantic ocean" to get to it.

i'm glad you made it home safely.

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